This week our pastor preached a sermon called
"The School of Contentment". About halfway through, he stopped so we could listen to a few minutes of a radio talk show featuring financial guru, Dave Ramsey.
Dan and I just had to laugh as we listened, and said "no wonder Jeff was so interested in our Dave Ramsey stuff that night he was over for dinner!". Let me back up and give you a frame of reference...
Before Thanksgiving, our parents started asking for our Christmas lists. I always struggle with this as I'm too pragmatic. Anyway... my biggest wish was a computer as the one we use now is actually my brother's and it's a dinosaur--more than 7 years old--and very unreliable and slow. My dad called and told me to pick out a laptop for around $1,000. I started shopping and the greedy bug kicked in...I wanted more and more and more and more "necessary" options on the laptop.
One night while Dan and I were just about to order my new laptop, I threw him a curve ball. I admitted that I was kinda sick about ordering the laptop--I mean, how in the world could I spend money on this when we would not spend our own money on it because we still had a deck and a van to pay off. I felt like money given as a gift had to be used even more responsibly than our own money. That night I made a tough phone call where I told my dad I wouldn't be ordering the laptop and gave him my reasons. He told me that he was going to send me a check in the mail the next day and let me do what I chose with it as it was a gift.
When we got the check, we took it to the bank and immediately deposited it and sent it off toward the debt we owed on the deck. I never even think about wanting the laptop anymore. Dan and I had some tough conversations about anticipating money from our families and our deep desire to "make it on our own" and not to have to lean on them or ask for help--even in "emergencies".
When we were visiting my parents the following February, we asked if we could sit down with them one night and share our financial situation and ask them for some advice. We flat out told them we didn't want them giving us money to bail us out of life situations that had happened to us, but that instead we really wanted them to teach and mentor us on how to be good stewards and fiscally responsible so that we could handle whatever comes our way on our own. They gave us some great words of encouragement and reassurance that we were indeed on the right track, but might need to step up our game if financial independence was really our goal.
A week after we got home, we got a package. It was the Dave Ramsey "Get out of Debt" starter kit--complete with the "Total Money Makeover" book, and three CD's--one about getting out of debt, one on financial peace, and another with software for keeping track of your finances. My parents purchased and sent this to us to give us a little guidance to get us started on our journey to radical financial freedom.
I sat down that night and read 104 pages of the book. It made so much sense! Poor Dan, I was just like a zealot! A few weeks later he, too, picked up the book and he burned through the entire book from cover to cover in two days--it's so well-written and entertaining! On the wings of enlightenment and inspiration, we took up our stances and circled the ring as we prepared to battle the money monster. What gets me is we did the Crown Financial Study about 5 years ago, but that was more of a theological foundation whereas Dave gives you practical steps for action to go ahead and DO something.
Although ther
e was some snazzy software for bookkeeping, I suggested we try the old pencil, paper, checkbook and calculator method. Kind of a return to basics and simplicity rather than being distracted by all the bells and whistles technology offers. We also decided to receive paper bills and write physical checks and mail them to pay our bills so that we were both seeing every bill and statement and there was a written record of every payment and transaction, and any errors could only be blamed on us, not the bank or computer or technology. We got pretty radical. But it's been worth it.
Taking Dave's practical suggestions to heart, we've been doing and sticking to our pencil and paper budget since April 1. Since that time, we have saved our first $1,000 emergency fund, been able to pay off our deck, and pay off our mini van. We have one debt left to go--our tax preparer last year goofed up our social security payment, so this year we corrected that, amended our taxes, and need to back pay a year's worth of ss payments. We have this money in the bank, and are planning to pay it off after we return from our Africa trip in June. Then our only debt will be our mortgage payment, and we will be able to breathe! Until something breaks...and it will. I'm sure it will.
Thankfully, we started and were somewhat aggressive about investing in our retirement funds, 401K plans, IRA's, kids' college funds, life insurance policies etc. at the beginning of our marriage 7 years ago. So we are feeling like in the next 3-6 months, we will be free from the stress and bondage of money.
Jeff's sermon on contentment was perfectly relevant to us both. We kept looking at each other, laughing, and both of us had to hold back a whole lotta "Amens" that we wanted to shout out right there in church. Could you imagine two white people amening???
We've both had to enroll, re-enroll, join the remedial program, then do summer school over and over again in this area, but it's getting a little easier each time around the block. It is amazing what contentment looks like to us--it is something neither of us would ever imagine. Ever. I'm sure that we'll even have to re-enroll again as Dan and I know this will be a life-long commitment-we struggle every time we see someone else with a new toy, upgrade, professional haircut, or hear about trips or dinners out. It ain't easy. And we don't have it all figured out. Boy, we sure don't. And we still have some pretty voluminous "discussions" about money. And I'm sure there will be more.
We have already loaned out one of our Dave Ramsey CD's, but the book and other 2 CD's are up for grabs. And Jeff's sermon was timely and relevant, so be sure to give it a listen. And if anyone else coughed up the $2 to buy the Dave Ramsey CD they sold after the service, could we borrow it from you? Thanks!
My relationship with Liam swings like a pendulum made of a spider's-silk strand.
Then we do the touchups and add more chocolate jimmies ("sprinkles" to Michiganders)
